


The Art of Broken Pieces

by cyclomonster



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Fluff, I'm so sorry, Soooo sappy, You've been warned, disgusting, like soap-opera sappy, maudlin if you will
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-04
Updated: 2014-12-04
Packaged: 2018-02-28 03:14:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2716823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cyclomonster/pseuds/cyclomonster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The holidays have passed. And good thing, too, cuz Carmilla's so over this emotional vampire crap.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Art of Broken Pieces

**Author's Note:**

> I um, didn't know how to end this. So the ending is sucky. Actually the whole thing is kinda sucky. I'm sorry xD

The holidays were gone, and with them left the buzzing warmth, the cozy songs,  
“And the artificial altruism,” Carmilla added while she and Laura put away the tree. “It’s a trick of the senses. Simple, really.”

Laura laughed, rolling up the Christmas lights. “Must you deconstruct everything?”

Carmilla scoffed.

Laura put her hands up. "Sorry! Sorry. Continue, Professor."

“Right. _Anyway_ , holidays, as I was saying, are designed to package love.” Carmilla plucked ornament after ornament off the tree. “And by love, I mean the formation of family units, which, through procreation, replenish the consumer base required to sustain capitalism. In effect, this brings the agenda full-circle, because the holidays as we know are the pinnacle of consumerism, at least in the Western world.”

“So lucky for us, we can’t be held accountable for reproducing the wretched system, right?” Laura finished with the lights and tossed them in the box. “I mean, we’re kind of exempt from the whole procreation thing.”

Carmilla’s eyes softened. She grabbed her by the waist and pulled her flush against her, stealing the breath from her lungs. “For now.” But the words had no sexual undertones or silliness. “I’d never ask you to carry it, though,” she mumbled. “If you didn’t want to. Well, I wouldn’t carry it either, unless you put on your puppy face and paid me in cupcakes. But I was thinking maybe, like, we could adopt, since there’s a surplus of them.”

Laura’s eyes widened. Carmilla was…was she serious? Her doubt was apparently super transparent, because Carmilla blinked repeatedly and took a stutter-step backwards. Laura was speechless as she followed her into the kitchen.

And she was still speechless while Carmilla grabbed two jugs of eggnog out of the fridge—hers tinged pink with added blood—and poured them into two glasses. She handed Laura hers, avoiding her gaze.

“Hey,” Laura said, setting her glass on the counter. Carmilla hid her face in the glass tilted to her lips. Laura gently took it from her and set it beside hers. “I’m not freaked out or anything. It’s just, well, just that-”

“I’m not good at these things,” Carmilla said. “I know that. It wouldn’t have shocked you so much if I’d been a little better at communicating or whatever.”  


“Hey, no, that’s-”

“But I do want you.” Carmilla took a deep breath. “I want us, and whatever that means to you. Whatever you want it to mean. And, well, you were smiling so much watching those kids when I took you ice-skating. I guess I figured you wanted kids. I mean, even if it’s just a coercive societal expectation, it’s something real, right? It’s-”

Laura kissed her. “Wow,” she breathed when she pulled away, mostly from the kiss but also because Carmilla had just sounded _exactly_ like her. “You’re really catching on to me.” She backed her up against the counter. Carmilla hopped onto it, and Laura closed the gap between them, leaning between her thighs.

Carmilla cradled her face. She brushed some hair back, so delicately that it tickled. “So precious,” she mouthed, seemingly to herself. “All mine.” 

Laura rested her face against her palm, arms looping around her. Her smile faded as Carmilla’s eyes glossed over. “Baby, what’s wrong?” 

Carmilla sniffed and chuckled, voice faltering. She released Laura’s face to take her hands and bring them to her lap. “Nothing, just…I love you. It hurts sometimes. Like, physically hurts. It feels as though I’m broken. Broken, but whole. Complete.” She worried her lip, a cute habit she did when deep in thought. “ _Kintsukuroi,_ ” she finally said. 

Laura tilted her head. “Um…I love you too?" 

Carmilla smiled and started playing with her hand, tracing the lines of her palm. “It’s Japanese,” she said. “They fuse the shards of shattered vases and such with liquid gold. The philosophy is that something can be more beautiful after it's broken.” She sighed, and Laura nodded, prodding her to go on. “And that’s what I am, I think--I hope--because of you.” Suddenly she looked so fragile. “And somewhere, there’s someone you could be with right now. Someone else you could love. An-and-” 

“Nope,” Laura chirped. She pulled Carmilla off the counter into her arms. “Nope, nope, nope.” She nuzzled Carmilla’s cheek and started rocking them from side to side. When they stopped, Carmilla’s lower lip was trembling. “Guess what you’re not allowed to do?” Laura whispered, sliding a hand behind her neck and beneath her hair, tracing the shell of her ear with her thumb. “You’re not allowed to imagine me in a place without you.” Now it was her turn to get teary-eyed. “I’m lonely just thinking about it.” 

Carmilla breathed out and nodded, shoulders sagging. 

Laura whined. “Aww, baby, does someone need a pick me up?" She grabbed her arm and cuddled it to her chest. "Christmas movies? Hot chocolate? I could teach you how to knit, or. Oh! We could watch _Frozen_!”

Carmilla’s jaw dropped. “ _Seriously!?_ ” She threw her hands up. “Yeah, or, we could go to the DMV. Or do our taxes. Or relive my near-death experience. Literally anything that has nothing to do with the season. Speaking of which, can we just skip this season next year?" She shuddered. "I can _not_ go through this emotional vampire crap again.”  



End file.
